As the holiday season is upon us, do you have your shopping done, or are you the person who procrastinates to the very last shopping day? It’s human nature to put off to tomorrow what could be done today. This holiday season, I have one wish for you. When it comes to elderly parents, friends, or clients, don’t procrastinate!

Life happens, and things like recurring snowstorms, as we saw in central and southern Ontario over the last few weeks, can take you by surprise. With the combination of early winter storms, an aging population, and fewer family caregivers nearby, there is a high demand for retirement home suites. Older people struggle to live alone in rural locations and scramble to find retirement home space, if only over the winter. The same thing seems to happen in urban areas, but there is no room at the inn!

Consider this common scenario. Dad is 94 years old and lives on a farm west of Collingwood. For 50 years, he’s lived in the snowbelt, and it’s hard to leave. Since Mom died, he has had increasing difficulty looking after the place. He now has trouble with cooking and getting groceries. Sometimes, when we call, he seems confused. The question is – why haven’t you had a conversation with dad before this?

Why do we procrastinate when it comes to getting lifestyle planning underway for elderly parents or friends? We all do it. And if you are an estate planning advisor, why do you delay having this key conversation with clients?

Family members often delay having a planning conversation because they are worried about resistance from their parent(s) and don’t know how to respond to it. Some adult children have difficulty coping with an evolving role reversal when the adult child eventually takes on the parenting role. Or perhaps a family is waiting for an older brother or sister to say something. Others say they don’t trust themselves to do or say the right thing. Sometimes, family members say they didn’t act because they didn’t want to be judged by the rest of the family and friends. Every family situation is unique. And perfection is a goal never reached.

As an estate planning advisor, we could proactively address lifestyle planning by reviewing our client list and doing a smart ageing check for clients segmented by decades. Start with the 90+-year-olds on the list and have specific conversations about their written plans for such key topics as their preferences for personal care and accommodation if their requirements change, health planning and medical coordination, advance care directives, and a review of their power of attorney documents to ensure they are up to date, the attorneys are still willing to act, and they are prepared to follow your wishes. If you are uncomfortable having these conversations, elder management companies are readily available to assist you.

Delays in planning, especially for the last decades of life, can be costly in both human and financial terms. Sadly, we see procrastination leading to a serious decline in the elderly person’s well-being or even becoming a crisis with a serious fall or increasing illness. When an elderly person slips into a situation where they are increasingly unable to care for themselves, it increases stress for them and their family. With repeated delays, fewer good options may be available, and the costs could dramatically increase during a crisis.

Our wish for you this holiday is to proactively review and encourage your older parents, friends, or clients to plan for smart ageing. Don’t spend time ‘admiring’ the problems. Ask for help.

If the situation is more complex, seek out elder management expertise to sort out the complexities and bring options to the table so your family or clients can make informed decisions about what needs to be done and what it will cost. With a new year on the horizon, don’t be the pro in procrastination.